Tuesday, August 4, 2015

Moral of the story: don't wear pants

On a Friday night a few weeks ago, the husband and I chose to be lazy Americans, and went to bed without cleaning the kitchen. The next morning, Taylor went to the store for diapers while I lazed about in my underwear. Baby Arrow took it upon herself to empty all the cupboards she could find while I sorted through cat pictures on Pinterest.

Then it began.


The caller box rings for my apartment. Without talking in the phone, I just unlock the building door, and go back into the bedroom. After a moment, the doorbell rings. Usually Taylor leaves the keys with me if he goes somewhere, because if you set the deadbolt, you can only open it from the outside. If there were ever an emergency in the apartment while we were locked in... well let's just not think about that. For whatever reason though, Taylor didn't leave the keys with me that day. So when the doorbell rings, I call out through the door, "You have the keys!" And then a RUSSIAN MAN answers, "I will open from front."


Insert instant panic. I don't know who I let in, the place is a mess, and I'm only wearing underwear. I start yelling through the door, "No! Nyet! Don't come in! I'm not dressed! Stop opening the door!" I run back to "get dressed", but instead start freaking out who was trying to get inside the apartment. After taking .25 seconds to weigh the options, I decide it's probably some English speaking serial killer who happened to have keys to the apartment. I shoot a text Taylor and continue literally prancing about the apartment in a dazed panic, flying about in my undergarments. From Taylor's end, he apparently drops his groceries in the store and starts running. (Apparently the text was a wee bit frightening.)

I knew Taylor was home as soon as I could hear him outside the door, speaking in that rough Russian tongue. I figure now that the hubby is home, I probably can put on some pants. When I exit from the room, I see that our probably evil-doer visitor was actually our super nice landlord, who was dropping by to check some pipes.

I feel a little bad for assuming the first person to visit us here would be the murdering sort of person. I feel even worse though that our landlord happened to call on the morning when the apartment was such a mess.


The landlord must have forgiven us though, because he and his girlfriend invited us to go to a palace that afternoon. I also think he felt bad for scaring us, because it was pretty obvious that I wasn't just taking time to put on clothes to open the door. Although, bonus points to me for not lying when I said I wasn't dressed. Moral of the story = if you don't wear pants, you have a very valid excuse not to open door to a potential serial killer. This is important.



Anyway, this post originally started out about the palace, and not about murderers and landlords. Funny how writing digresses like that. Let's look at the palace photos now. :)

Presenting: Peterhof Palace



Interesting fact about the palace there. Our friends told us that the coloring was made with mercury, so a lot of people got sick after building this temple. Since they probably didn't realize that they were contracting mercury poisoning, I wonder if the temple builders' sickness had any effect on their faith.



My camera battery was all but dead when I brought it along. So sad. So the rest of the pictures are taken from my fabulous android (which has a not-so-fabulous camera)






I believe this is a golden statue of the Greek god Titus




and some fellow golden turtles that we couldn't take seriously.




I have never seen this type of horn in real life... nor have I witnessed a live performance of Russian classical music. I wish we could have stayed to enjoy the music a little bit longer.


Beautiful palace gardens


If you want some good luck, toss a coin up on this statue. If your coin lands and stays up there, then your wish will come true ;)





It was soo nice to see the sea. Being around water always brings a sense of peace.

I love this fountain so much. (I whipped my camera out and snapped a couple shots on its dead juices.)




Our "Aren't we so glad our landlord isn't a serial killer and took us to this beautiful palace today" selfie




Beautiful place. So grateful to friendly people who invite us on impromptu adventures :)



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